Today I got to spend the morning with an old friend. We see each other about once a year and talk on the phone whenever we have the chance (and since I have Bean and she has three little guys, that isn't nearly as often as we would like). We live pretty far away from each other, so these face to face visits are pretty special and really looked forward to.
She's a friend of mine from before married life. We went to school together and were "in the trenches" of inner city teaching together. She kept me sane, made me laugh, and listened to me cry. We were even kind of in the infertility trenches together. When I was trying to get pregnant with Bean, she was trying to get pregnant with her second. She never went to see a doctor or had interventions, but it took her a year to get pregnant, and we would talk about the heartache and frustration.
Not long after I had my miscarriage, she called to say that she was pregnant again. I have to say that it was the only time during those years that I was able to be happy for someone without being sad for myself. When I did finally get pregnant, we happened to be visiting near where she lived and I got to spend the day with her. Her birthday had just passed and I had been so crazy with all of the newly pregnant details, that I hadn't had a chance to get her a gift. Just before we left home though, actually on her birthday, we had our first or second ultrasound at about 6 weeks and I had a picture from it. I told her that I was sorry that I didn't have a present for her, but I could show her a present that I got on her birthday. When she took the picture out of the envelope and realized what it was, she was beyond excited. The threw the picture up in the air and yelled, scaring both of her kids, and then worrying that she had hurt my precious picture. It was the best reaction I got telling people that I was pregnant because she didn't know the ins and outs of our doctors visits like most people did, so I could surprise her, and she really got it.
She's my only fertile friend who I really feel like understands all parts of me. When I was trying to have a baby and we'd get to spend time together, I would love on her kids and just imagine what it would be like to add my own to the mix. So this visit was really special because it was the first time that she met Bean and the first time that our little miracle babies were together. Hubby and I have joked ever since Bean was born that her little boy that it took her so long to add to her family, was Bean's little boyfriend. The just both seem like special little babies and since they're only a year apart, we just couldn't help it. Well today when they met it seemed like they knew our plan, because they got along just wonderfully together and took to each other right away.
So today I got the day that I had dreamed of long ago with the two of us chatting while our little ones played. Talking about nap times, breastfeeding, and play dates instead of basal body temperatures and negative pregnancy tests. It was a special day, with a one of a kind friend, and our little miracles.
Can I be envious of your friend? She sounds so lovely and understanding. You are very lucky!! I'm glad you had such a nice time with her!!
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