Friday, May 13, 2011
Ordinary Birthday Girl
Yesterday was my birthday. I spent years while we were trying to conceive hating my birthday. It meant another year without a baby and another year older. The older I got, the farther away from my family plan I was and the more desperate the situation felt. There's such a focus on age with infertility that it's hard not to get caught up in it. I had this obsession with having my first baby before I turned 30 and I made it, by a week. By the time Bean got here though, it just didn't matter anymore. Yes, I still have some anxiety when it comes to age and growing our family, but I'm more at peace with it now. So last year I was still recovering from my c-section on my birthday and while I had the best present in the world, I didn't even realize what day it was. This year, I could actually enjoy it a little more. So I took a step away from everything else that was happening in my life (which I think I've started to have a different, more peaceful perspective on anyway, more to come) and just focused on the day. Sadly, we were all sick on my birthday, but it didn't even matter. Hubby took the day off of work and it was just a wonderful day with our little family. There weren't any big parties or major happenings, but it was my favorite birthday in a long time. I'm going to take the peace and love that I felt yesterday and channel it into all parts of my life because that's what I so need right now. So here's to another year! So far my 30's have been more amazing then I ever could have imagined. I can't wait to see what's next!
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